Dear blog, well, hmm...i've being thinking a lot today and yesterday...and well, after uncle talked to dad, he doesn't seems to want to believe that sometimes it can be the parents fault...and yesterday when uncle talks to mum and i at house downstairs before going up, he says that sometimes parents don't understand us teens..and that is very true...and even uncle freddie says that times has changed...the way that mum and dad control us is making i and sis moving away...and uncle says tat i'm not a bad girl after all...compared to others....mum told him i tried to ran away before...haiz...why of all things go tell him this? he says tat i'm not so bad after all...compared to other teens...wait till he knows my history..he wasn't in singapore at that time..tats why...even if he is..maybe he won't know...even dad and mum don't know...haha...when i'm out, i'm a devil..at home i'm an angel...bt now times have changed....and thinking abt it....haiz...shouldn't have make that route...mum kept argueing with uncle freddie that it is not her fault...bt sometimes, it is...she control me like don't know wat...in the past...even now..sometimes also...a control freak my mum and dad is...even uncle freddie say it is not good...it is a form of abuse...not physical...bt emotional...yar..i fully agree to it....they have been abusing me since i was a child emotionally...tat is why i've become so emotional...which i hated a lot....like watever...i can't believe that throughout the time that uncle freddie talked, i was stoning....like elsewhere..juz nodding whenever he asked me something...hmm.....and of all times, these probs must come now....haiz...backstabbing is painful...and well..frontstabbing is even worst! so to whoever is doing that to me..plz stop it...i hate it..haiz...like watever....at home, must see those ppl....reminded of so many stuff...felt so miserable at home...then when i go out with them, feel so miserable also....haiz....where are u, all my friends? haiz...one in australia...one in america.....then the rest go holiday is it? haha...wat crazy thoughts i've these few days...go away in the name of Jesus....kept thinking of committing suicide....all thanxs to one man..tat call me to go jump down a building....i can't believe i pratically listens to wat everyone tells me...to do this..to do that...sometimes i do silly things....i also don't know..wat has become of me? this few days nv go to school...not much things to do...tat makes me feel so useless...so bored...silly things juz came into my mind....HELP...God, plz help me.....